Pray

Here it is, after midnight, and I'm sitting here crying. There's a little boy whose family goes to my old church (where my parents still go) who has cancer, neuroblastoma. He'll be 4 in June and he's had cancer since just after his second birthday.

I remember the first time I saw the little boy. It was before the cancer and he was toddling around. His family had just started going to our church. I immediately noticed him because he has bright red hair. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. It was before Matt and I were TTC, but I always dreamed about our future children even then. I looked at this little boy and thought, "that's what our future son will look like." I felt so strongly that I would have a baby like him. I remember watching the little boy after the church service. He was running around and into everything. His parents were young and chased after him with smiles on their faces. I just kept thinking how precious it was and how I couldn't wait to have a baby of my own to chase after.

And then they found out that beautiful baby boy had cancer. I've followed their journey closely, even though I've only talked to them a couple of times before. I feel like I have a connection just because of the time I watched the red headed boy playing. Not long after he was diagnosed I wrote on their support webpage guestbook. I said:

"Even though Matt and I have never officially met you, we are praying for your family everyday. We always enjoy seeing Carter in church with his beautiful red hair (Matt has red hair, too!). You are all an incredible example of trusting God and relying on His strength even though it is so hard sometimes."

That was in June 2008.

I've continued to read their journal entries on their support webpage. They update a couple of times a week at least, through the good times and the bad. I've read as Carter lost his red hair, went to Disney World, spent weeks at a time in the hospital, played with the visitor dogs, undergone surgeries and chemo, and got up out of bed time and time again to play and laugh.

Things haven't been looking too good lately though. He had a relapse last Spring, and children who have a relapse of this type of cancer have a very low survival rate. He has been in an experimental treatment plan the past few months, but a little while ago it became obvious it wasn't working, so he was removed from the program. His parents never say they are giving up though. They continue to have hope and pray for a recovery, but it is obvious that the doctors don't believe their son is going to make it.

They wrote a post a few hours ago saying they are taking their son back to the hospital because he's been doing very badly all weekend. The nurses who visited their home earlier were talking about admitting the little boy to a hospice. Things are not looking good at all. My heart is aching. No child deserves this. It's bad enough that little ones have to die, but it shouldn't be this painful, this drawn out. He's a toddler, he should be a little ball of energy that depletes his mom's energy at the end of every day. It shouldn't be his energy that is depleted after a few minutes of just sitting up.

Please, please pray for this boy!! Pray for his family, but especially pray that he will be healed!! There's no words to describe the horror of this situation, unfortunately I'm sure many of you have known people in similar situations though. I just feel like I need to share this with as many people as possible so that even if you only say one short prayer, at least that will be a few prayers more that reach the Lord and show him how his people can come together for others. How even people who aren't Christians can still pray for this child.

Opposite

Apparently all I have to do is write about something on here for the opposite to happen! Like saying my light bleeding/spotting is "regular" a couple of weeks ago. And talking about Evan taking longer naps awhile back. I can't find the post but I know I mentioned it because the next day he started only sleeping 1.5 hours in the morning instead of 2-2.5 like he was for a bit (I'm not complaining, it's just funny that he cut back on those naps just after I bragged about it!). Anyway, I think I should only post about negative things on here. lol

I'm having cramps for the first time since giving birth. Ugg. I also have a UTI. It was bothering me a little on Monday, quite a bit more on Tuesday (so I made a doc appt), and then not at all on Wednesday which is when I had the appointment. It didn't show up that I had an infection on the test they did in the office and the doctor said he doubted it was an actual infection, just an irritation. So I happily left the office, feeling fine. On Friday afternoon a nurse called and said the culture they ran on the test came up positive for infection, so they were going to call in antibiotics for me. I told her I was feeling completely fine but she said I should take them anyway. So there you have it...my first UTI. I'm sure y'all really want to know about it!! ;-) Anyway, I don't know if the cramps are related to that or a period or the weird spotting I'm having (and maybe that is related to the UTI?). Weird things are happening to me!!

I also had a little insomnia last night. I used to not sleep well at all until I went to college. Then I was fine until I got pregnant. I also had problems sleeping after Evan started sleeping through the night, but I would still wake up. But since Christmas, when Evan started sleeping in his crib in the nursery, I have been sleeping great! But last night I couldn't.

Yesterday evening Matt and I went out to celebrate our 8 year dating anniversary while my sister watched Evan. We went through the drive thru at Wendy's and ate in the car on the way to the movie theatre. We saw THIS movie in 3D. I really liked it! The 3D was neat and the story was so cute.

Bath time

Evan is growing too big for his infant tub. What is the next step? I know they used to have bath rings that you put the baby in for the regular sized tub, but I think I heard those are now dangerous. Evan isn't sitting up unsupported, so he still needs a little more support before he can just sit in the regular tub. The infant tub says it's also a toddler tub, but it is too small for him now!

6 months old.

7 months for Evan, 8 years for the parents!

Yesterday was Evan's 7 month birthday! I think he looks older...I wonder if he feels any older. ;-) And actually, he has changed so much in just the past week. He's so much more coordinated. He will see his pacifier, reach for it, grab it, and put it in his mouth (the right way!). He does it all in one smooth motion. A couple of weeks ago it was much more of a process for him to do that. Sure, he could see things and grab them and put them in his mouth, but there was more scrambling around, he wouldn't get them in his mouth just right, etc.

He's smiling more and more each day. Evan was a slow smiler. He smiled for real (not just gas) when he was 5 weeks old. However, it was until closer to 5 months before he started smiling on a regular basis. And even after that he was slow to smile. However, now he smiles all the time! He still doesn't laugh much though unless he's laughing at Daddy (or Daddy's friend, R). But I'm hopeful that the laughing will be like the smiling, that someday the house will be full of it all the time! Yesterday he was taking a nap in his car seat in the car. When I was getting him out I opened the car door and moved the sunshade cover that is attached to the infant seat. It woke him up. He opened his eyes, saw me, and immediately smiled!! I feel SO blessed to have him and it's the best feeling in the world when he is obviously so happy to see me. :-)

He isn't crawling yet, but he's rolling and scooting all over the place. He can make his way from one room to another just by that. He doesn't move much when I'm in the room with him though. It's if I leave that he starts moving all over the place. I still haven't child proofed the house much, but I'll get around to it!

Today, March 24, is me and Matt's 8th dating anniversary. It seems like just yesterday that we were two teenagers in love. A friend of mine said that she remembers when the guys in my high school Sunday school class used to have to drag Matt out of the high school class and into the college class. We started dating a couple of months before Matt graduated. After that he had to be in the college Sunday school class....but we didn't want to be separated! So all of the high school guys would gang up on Matt and physically drag him out. It was mostly silly and all in good fun, but looking back it was also kind of stupid how the teachers insisted that he leave. lol It just got me to thinking about how IN LOVE we were. I have always felt like we didn't lose that new love feeling as much as most couples do after being married and having kids...but after thinking about how extreme we were those first couple of years...I realize we really have lost a lot of it. That isn't necessarily a bad thing though. Just different. We're more mature now, we don't HAVE to be together all the time. But I'd also like to get a little more of that appreciation for each other back. We knew we were made for each other and we didn't want to be with anyone more than each other.

THIS is the link to the post I wrote last year about how our relationship began. It has pictures! But here is one of us in the Spring of 2002, just after we started our relationship. I'm 16 and Matt is 18! And we have our faces painted, I have a ladybug on my cheek. :-)

Baby products that make my life easier

Here's a list I've made of baby products that people have excitedly discovered from me or that I've excitedly discovered from other people. I don't think these are very common in other lists, because I've just stumbled upon them since becoming a mom. While they aren't necessary, they definitely make my life easier and I'm so glad I own each of these things!

So here they are in no particular order (click on the link to see the brand name, where you can purchase, and a picture):

Battery powered nasal aspirator Matt found this at a drugstore back in October when we were in Charleston and Evan had a really stuffed up nose. We hadn't had luck with a manual aspirator but this one helped so much! It was a little scary to use it at first because I was afraid we'd suck Evan's brains out, but it isn't that powerful. ;-) I thought it was funny that this particular brand's aspirator plays music to "soothe" babies while you are sucking their boogers out...but it's actually come in handy. We didn't need to use that until recently when Evan hasn't wanted to stay still long enough for us to do the job, so we play the music and it distracts him! He also likes to lick the clear little "booger catcher" while we do it. lol!

Saline spray I had never heard of using this to help loosen up nose mucus until asking around, but this stuff is awesome! We use it almost every day along with the aspirator. My pediatrician recommended it as well.



Saline wipesThis is my newest discovery. I had heard moms on the message boards talking about them before, but I didn't think they were necessary. Evan had a cold a couple of weeks ago and I could tell his nose was sore from all the wiping I was doing with tissues and wash clothes. I saw these in the store and bought them on a whim. I'm glad I did because they clean the nose better and it's gentler than using a wash cloth.



Pacifier wipes A friend of mine has these and I was stoked that they exist! Like all moms I have problems with pacifiers falling on the ground when we're out in public and I can't always go wash it with soap. So I just pull out one of these to wipe it off and we're good to go. You can also use this to clean toys and other things that are dirty and that will immediately go back into baby's mouth.



Biodegradable disposable diaper sacks - My SIL used these when she was at my house one time. She mentioned her bags were biodegradable. I would never buy plastic sacks that weren't biodegradable because I think there's enough plastic bag waste out there as it is. Now I know these don't immediately break down in the landfill, but at least they won't still be polluting the earth in a thousand years. I use these fairly often, mostly to put dirty diapers in before I throw them away out in public or at someone's house, but I also put wet clothes and dirty burp clothes in them too so that they don't make a mess in my diaper bag. In that case I can always use the bag again after I come home and remove the clothes. It's a shame that BRU and Tar.get don't sell biodegradable sacks, but all the drugstores I've been to sell them.



Gripe water A lady who works at my chiropractor's office told me about this. Once again, I didn't think it would be that great of a product. However, it's amazing! When Evan gets the hiccups (and it seems like he always does around naptime or bedtime), we give him this and they immediately go away! I don't even give him the full recommended dosage. The best thing about this is that it is all natural, so I don't worry about giving it to him regularly. This also helped when he had bad reflux and would sometimes cry when we laid him down. I don't give this to him every time he has hiccups or gas, but I do if it's interfering with his sleep or if he seems in pain.



Diaper bag with stroller attachment I have the diaper bag that is pictured and I get compliments on it ALL the time. Many of my mom friends seem fascinated with the stroller attachments. I just leave the stroller clips on the stroller handle all the time so that all I have to do is snap the bag on after I unfold the stroller. Then I have the bottom pocket compartment of the stroller free for other things and my diaper bag is easily accessible. This diaper bag is a little expensive, but in our case it was completely worth it!

Follow up to "Weird" post

I had a question about what happened to Evan's early waking situation I wrote about in THIS post. I ended up cutting out the dream feed and the late afternoon nap (for the most part). Cutting out that late afternoon nap has helped significantly with getting him to sleep all the way through the night. For awhile he'd wake up and we'd go put his pacifier in and he'd go right back to sleep. Since cutting out that nap he sleeps the entire night without waking or making any noise.

However, he's still waking earlier than I'd like. Last week I read that putting babies to bed earlier actually makes them sleep later. Yeah, WEIRD! So I've been trying to get him to bed around 7:00 instead of 8:00. It seems like it's working!! He's been sleeping until around 7:30 every morning. I want to make his bedtime more consistent. That's the one sleepy time that I'm bad about making consistent and it's really the most important one. I also want to make our bedtime routine different than our naptime routines. So I'm hoping that will get him to sleep till 7:30 EVERY morning or maybe even until 8:00.

Right now our bedtime routine is: nurse, quietly talk for a little while (if I fed him a little early, otherwise it's straight to bed), Matt takes him and i kiss him goodnight. Matt reads him a book, sings him a song while rocking him, jiggles him and "sshhh"s him (that's an Evan thing, it helps him wind down), and then puts him to bed. However, I read to him before his morning nap as well as sing and jiggle him. So at night I think we are going to start adding a prayer time. That's a good habit to start anyway.

I've also discovered that the nights we give him a bath just before bed he sleeps later in the mornings. I only wish we could give him a bath every night, but it's too much to do at that time of day at this point. It'll be a little better when he's older and can help out a little. I remember giving the toddler who lived with my family a bath every night before bed. I loved it so much. Of course, he needed a bath before bed because it was summer when that was my "job" and he played outside before dinner every night.

Oh well, what has helped your baby sleep longer and better during the night? I will make sure to update once we become more consistent too!

Good Luck Charmer

May love and laughter light your days,
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world
with joy that long endures.
May all life's passing seasons
bring the best to you and yours!